Wednesday, October 3, 2007

Introduce Yourselves

Please tell me your smoking story. Why did you start? Why are you quitting? Is this your first try? I want to support your quit.

Tracee

20 comments:

Tara said...

Guess I'll go first! My name is Tara and I am 30 years YOUNG. LOL
I started smoking around 15-16 years of age. I guess socially and at first because a guy I was dating offered me one. It was an "only when I drink" thing, but we all know how that goes. I was up to two packs a day in college, but am now at 1 pack per day. I am a teacher of 8th grade students. I want to quit to be a positive role model, to save money, for my husband, not to be a social outcast, and for myself. NONE of my friends smoke and anytime we do anything it is always me lagging behind to smoke a cigarette. I am constantly running outside at work on my break to smoke instead of spend time with my co-workers or do actual work. I am excited and scared all in one. Today is my 6th day on Chantix and I have noticed a little difference. The car will be my worst place. I'm sure hoping that "not really want it any more" kicks in soon.

Tracee said...

Tara,

It sounds like you're quitting for all the right reasons. Thanks for being the brave first one to post!

We have a lot in common. I volunteer with youth and I felt terrible about telling them not to smoke and then smoking as soon as I left the activity. It's terrible to feel like you're a bad role model when you're basically doing a good deed.

Get your car detailed. Get it totally clean and smelling good.

I smoked outside at church for heaven's sake. There's just something that felt inherently wrong about that.

I even went down for a cigarette after giving birth. I thought, now that baby's born I can finally smoke again!

I think you'll find the link between "I have stress" and "I need a cigarette to resolve this" abated. But, you'll also find that the stress is still there and you'll feel like you don't know what to do about it.

Hang in there. Try some new things. You can do this. You're brave for trying. You have a lot of kids to quit smoking for as a teacher.

You can totally do this. Change is hard, but it's worth it.

Keep coming back.

Mary said...

My name is Mary, and I have smoked for 27 years off and on. More on than off. I finally decided it was time to kick the habit once and for all. I am on my 10th day of Chantix and so far so good. It's kind of weird; I have no craving,but I want to smoke. I have 3 grandaughters and I want to be able to chase them around the yard without having to stop to catch my breath. I want to see them grow up. I want to feel better,breathe better. I already feel better and have noticed my breathing is easier when I jog in the mornings. That helps keep me motivated to not smoke. I have cheated a couple of times. I'm really glad I found this site. It's nice to be able to talk to other people going through the same things. Unless you are an ex smoker, you just don't understand. I kind of feel like I'm mourning a loved one. I know, that sounds weird, but that's what it feel like. Thanks for being here and listening. Mary

Tracee said...

Mary it's not weird at all.

You're feeling is exactly what's going on. You ARE mourning a loved one.

Smoking has seen you through every single little moment in your life. All of your memories and emotions are attached to smoking.

When anything traumatic happened you smoked. Smoking was your best friend. The one that would never leave. It's been with you forever.

You absolutely need to and should mourn the loss of your best friend. Even if your best friend is an A-hole and treats you like crap (Apt discription of Cigs)- they were still your best friend. There is still a valid and legitimate painful loss that must be experienced to properly let go of it for good.

Glad you're here Mary. Mourn. Cry. You've spent a lot of time with your friend. It's not silly and it's not nothing.

Keep coming back!

Judi said...

Hey all! My name is Judi and I have been a smoker for 39 years. This is my second ride on the Chantix train. I did this in March of this year and did not smoke for a month on Chantix. Well, I decided I didn't need to take it anymore...NOT! I ended up right back to where I was before starting on Chantix within 2 weeks. So, I decided, lets give it another try. I started taking the pills yesterday 10/07/07 and my quit date is for next Sunday 10/14/07. I know I can do this if I just stay on the dern pills this time. I have to say, all the times I have tried to quit, Chantix helped me with the cravings more than the patch or anything else! So hang in there! I am going too!!

Judi said...

Oh Mary!
Hang in there gal! You are doing Awesome!!! And I totally understand about the mourning thing...cigs have been a big part of our lives for a very long time. And when they are gone...there is a big void. That's the kicker...filling that void! All that time we spent puffing..isn't that something!

Judi said...

And I am doing really well on day two all!

Judi said...

Hi Tara too!
I am just soooo happy I found all of you....I will try and keep up with everyone everyday ok? I do wish all of you the most Wonderful Afternoon!
Judi :)

Judi said...

I meant to Thank you Tracee for doing this too! I hope Tara is ok...

Judi said...

Hi again!
I just wanted to tell you all a little bit about me. I live in NC and have tried too many times to quit smoking. I started when I was 12 years old and I am now...well, we won't go there, but if you can add....I smoked for 39 years...ok...now that you added...I am 51 and still very very young at heart. I had a terrible auto accident in 2004 and you can say, that really is the longest time I went without smoking because I was in such bad shape. The doctors told me I could never smoke again and of course, I agreed, but as soon as I got out of there..puff puff I go! So, it has taken me awhile to get to the point I am at (again) but I feel it's time. I not only need to do this for my health, but I know the Good Lord does not want me doing this either...it's just time to stop. I know I cannot do it on my own though and Chantix is the best route I know as far as curbing the cravings. I want to quit. I just need to knock off the self will stuff and do what I need to do. Bravo for all of you that have stuck to it and I wish you all that are quitting the best of luck too. We can get through this and one other thing I have found, going through this with others makes such a world of difference too!
Thanks all!

Tracee said...

Well, Judi, the hard thing about addiction is that it's sneaky. We believe it's over and then find out it's not.
The good news is that you're quiting again. Remember redefine failure and make it "that you never quit smoking." You're quitting again so kudos to you!

Hope things are going great Tara and Mary. This is hard, but it's totally worth it. You CAN do this!

Nashville Jen said...

I feel I was meant to find this blog today. I've been staring at a box of Chantix for ONE YEAR. It sits on my desk, and I tell myself that "next week I'll be in a good place to quit." I'm never in a good place to quit.

I started smoking when I arrived at college. I told myself I would only smoke in college. Then I told myself I would quit smoking when I was done with grad school. Then it was after the wedding, after this move or that one, and then when I got pregnant, and then after I recovered for pregnancy. So, here I am 18 YEARS LATER and still smoking.

I'm a closet smoker. I don't smoke in public; my parents still don't know I smoke. I hate being a smoker, but every time I quit it lasts for about 48 hours and then I freak out and have one.

The big problem is I work at home. I edit books, and every time I need a break from the work or switch projects I go have a cigarette.

Good to know that there is a good blog I can come and read supportive things on! THANKS!

Tracee said...

Oh Nashville Jen, we're soul sisters.

I was only going to smoke till I got pregnant. Then my 5 year old had to scream and cry "QUIT SMOKING MOMMY I DON'T WANT YOU TO DIE."

So, I guess I smoked longer than I had intended.

But, it's not going to be like it was last time. Those 48 hours were when there was no Chantix. With the Chantix it's going to be different.

You can take breaks at work (even if it's at home) - you deserve them.

Big drinks of water.
Walks around the block.
A cup of yogurt.
A short brain game.
A game of sudoko or crossword.

Nashville Jen - You can do this. I think it's your time.

Judi said...

Well Goodmorning all!
Day 3 on Chantix and I have got to tell you. I messed up. I overdosed myself on Chantix! What an idiot I am sometimes!!! I started using the chantix I was using before. Instead of taking the white pills I started on the blue ones. (It says day 1,2,3) DUH!!! I thought I was getting the flu last evening and was sooo sick, but much better today and I will be very careful from now on too. But guess what? I did not smoke with my coffee this morning. :) Now that is and has always been a real biggie for me. Having a cig with my coffee. No craving. Just did something else. I figure when I do start getting cravings, DO SOMETHING ELSE!!! WE have got to. My triggers are everywhere and anytime too and I just have to teach myself to do other things instead of lighting up. I smoke at the computer, at work, in the car, at home and on and on...so I know exactly what you mean jen about working from home (I have a company and work on that when not working here) Tracee had some excellent ideas about your breaks. We have to make ourselves do other things or we are doomed to go back and light it up! I think there is a reason you found this too yesterday, just like I did. I hope you consider quitting now too. We CAN DO THIS! And chantix really does help with the cravings!! Big Time!

Judi said...

I do want to share this with you too. When I got in my wreck, they had to do the trachea thing on me. Anyway, this just shows how smoking obsessed I was. My trachea would not close on its own. Even while I was not smoking. I started to get really stressed walking around and working with a hole in my neck that sounded like I was farting from it everytime I would talk or exert myself in anyway. So, I started puffing again. Yes, smoke even came out of the hole in my neck. How gross is that? Well, my docs did not know I had started back yet. They did the surgery on my neck to close it. Well, I came too after surgery, had this stick thing sticking out of my neck and what do I do? I get out of bed and go outside to smoke a cig. Now how dumb is that? Then, who goes walking by while I am standing out in front of the hospital smoking? My doctor. I thought she was gonna kill me right there! She was hot and I don't blame her. This just goes to show how obsessed I was with smoking....

Tracee said...

Wow Judi, that's some story. I used to walk past people like you and think it was the looniest thing I ever saw. How stupid can you be?

Then I stepped outside myself and saw myself smoking while my daughter cried hysterically and while I was wearing a heart monitor. Still smoking.

Then I thought, oh this is how those crazy people do it. They have to. They can't stop. The mind gets warped and twisted and reason is lost.

I must stop this, I thought.

I'm so glad you're quitting. All of you. Tara and Mary, every one of you. It's very important to stop smoking.

Do something else.

Judi said...

Hey again Tracee and everyone!
Thanks for being here. See Tracee...we are totally nuts when we are addicted to smoking! Isn't that something. I was reading that someone told your daughter you were going to die if you kept smoking. I would have been totally pissed too! That is so wrong, but I am glad it got you turned around on the smoking, but it was just so wrong of someone to say that to a child like that. Did you ever find out who did that? That just really bugs me! But it worked, but that is not the point. I just think it was the lowest of lows to tell a child that! I just had to say that!
I really feel doing this with all of you will help a whole lot!!! Do you believe I never did the "blog" thing before? I have been online for years and years, but never got into that. Glad I am now!!!Isn't it something how things work out?
WEll, I am still doing good so far today...and I am going to take it a day, a minute, a second if need be at a time to do this! I really do love not smoking too, just never gave myself a chance to stay with it. Keep the Faith all! We will do this!

Tracee said...

Pissed is an understatement. I felt it was a loathsome thing to do to tell my child I would die.

I'm sure it was either my mother or my mother-in-law or my grandmother - someone who had a vested heartfelt interest in me not DYING in front of my children.

Not to mention the Red Ribbon Week information about smoking, commercials on tv about smoking, sitcoms with an anti-smoking moral, and smoking prevention campaigns in schools and church.

You can't be alive and not know smoking might kill you. My daughter got to an age where she put two and two together and then got pissed off that "I would leave her."

She sobbed, "Who will take care of me if you die? Who will be with me if you leave me?"

When I found myself smoking in the face of that - self-loathing took over more than being pissed that someone she understood the consequences of smoking.

After all I don't want her to smoke! So I can't tell her it's fine and not to worry about it.

judi said...

Hey there!
Day 5 and still chuggin' along! I have to admit since taking the recommended dose and not overdosing on the chantix, that my cravings are worse, but I am under alot of stress too and that is not helping a bit! But, my quit date is still on Sunday and I intend to stick with it!!! Hope you are having a good day Tracee and the other girls come back!
Talk to you tomorrow!

Tracee said...

Tara - you're allowed to smoke the first week. In fact, smoke your brains out like I talk about here: http://quitcoping.blogspot.com/2007/09/week-one-smoke-your-brains-out.html .

Don't be discouraged by urges and cravings to smoke until it's time to stop smoking. You have one free pass - a stay of execution! Use it, love it.