Thursday, December 27, 2007

Party Holiday

Yes, well we all know Christmas was stressful - but it's a family holiday.

Next Tuesday is New Year's and if it hasn't occurred to you - it's about to occur to you that you might be around more alcohol and ... cigarettes on New Year's Eve. New Year's Eve is a Party Holiday.

Here's the thing. I know that low and mournful feeling of thinking of yourself staying home from the party and missing all that fun and excitement. But. . .

Well. Maybe you've outgrown it.

You're in a very tender period at the moment. Vulnerable to relapse.

Your mind is telling you that perhaps, now that you haven't smoked for a bit, that you could maybe be a social smoker and only smoke on the big holidays or nights out on the town.

Fact: You can not.

IF you were a social smoker you would not need Chantix to quit smoking. IF you were at all capable of socially smoking you would not need support or medical intervention to quit.

ADDICTS need medical intervention and social support to quit smoking. ADDICTS have crossed a line - the line between being capable of controlling a substance or having a substance control them.

See the difference?

Because you have crossed the line you can never, ever go back.

Smoking will never and can never be casual or social for you. You're not like the others who never took it up seriously.

The sooner you accept that - the sooner you can free yourself from the self-made prison of addiction.

If you are one of the blessed Chantix users you may have noticed that other addictive urges have been quelled. You no longer feel the urge to drink alcohol, maybe your desire for coffee is lessened. Maybe you're not wishing you had a Xanex, pain pill or donut. Maybe, just maybe, the Chantix is being more of a dopamine blocking miracle than you thought.

If you're feeling no urge to drink - don't do it.
If you're feeling like you'll smoke if you go to the party - don't go.


Brandie said...

Thanks so much! I think your posts, more than anyone's, have helped me out. Especially at this moment. right before I read your post I was having the worst craving since quitting, now it's returned to a manageable state. Thanks. Again.

Mz Diva said...

I have been craving a cigarette since yesterday but I know I have crossed the line to cigarette addiction long ago. I will take my Chantix and seek out social support. I cannot afford to pick up that first cigarette or I will be a pack a day smoker! Cravings come and go but this one is a B$T(^! Thanks for the great post! It is really timely for me.

Tracee said...

Brandie and Mz. Diva - take if from someone about 6 months ahead of you in the process.

You will crave everytime you experience something that you previously associated with smoking.

Sex. After dinner. Christmas. Family. New Year's Eve.

But, the more you resist the less strong the cravings are. The second time you experience it - less craving. The third time - not much craving. Eventually no craving at all.

Everytime you feel the release of a craving - when it sets you free and passes after a minute or two I want you to say to yourself "Good girl. I knew you could do that." or something equally validating and acknowleding.

You can do this. I know you can. You just have to ride the cravings out. Take a shower, walk around the block - just do something else. Anything else.

Drink massive glasses of water without taking a breath. That's what i did in the beginning. Water will never be bad for you and it does "answer" a physical craving.

Mz Diva said...

Thanks for the support...I have taken many of your suggestions today. I kept myself busy hanging out with NON-SMOKERS! I am riding this out...I do not want to buy into the insanity that I can be a "soical smoker." My sister started out quitting with me and has decided she can be a "social smoker!" Lets just put it like this, I am avoiding the downstairs because it stinks! I am an addict and just need to ride out the craving. It will pass.

Tracee said...

Yes Diva - it will pass. Everytime it does you get a step closer to non-smoker and step away from your prison.

Good Girl. You are strong having her in your house. Tell her she has to leave the house to smoke.

nancy said...

You are so right, again... I thought about New Year's briefly yesterday when a friend sent me an invite to a party. It was a fleeting "maybe" - but you confirmed exactly why I did have reservations and after really thinking about it, I'm going to stay home. The house is only 5 houses away (normally stumbling distance) which will have plenty of smokers.

I just don't think I'm ready to be in "that atmosphere" with those friends yet. It's possible that a couple of drinks might make me a bit brazen and I could possibly smoke, then I'll feel like a real horse's @**.

So,we're going to have an early dinner out, then have our own "party" by pretending some earlier city in Europe is our time (mostly for the little one). We are going to do something fun as a family on New Year's Day and I won't be all stinky with a big throbbing head!

I hope all of you have a happy and HEALTHY New Year as well.

Tracee said...

You are so right Nancy. It's all about making healthier choices. YOUR version of a party sounds a lot more fun than a hang over and smoking and stumbling home down the street.

I too speak with a British Accent when the children and I do housework! Ha Ha.

Nancy said...

Hey Tracee.. this is irrelevant, but I read a blog of your's a while back; it was after you moved, about the old apartment/the new house (congrats, by the way), just a lot of great accomplishments you have made lately.

My question is, there was a book mentioned in it, a sort of financial guide, I can't remember the name for the life of me or find the blog anywhere, which I enjoyed reading. Hook me up, it might be something I'd like to focus on for the New Year. Which blog was it, I can't find it and it's making me crazy.

Thanks! A Happy and Healthy to you in '08. Nancy

Tracee said...

Hey Nancy, It's Dave Ramsey. He has this class called Financial Peace University.

Anyone who wants to educate themselves on finances, get out of debt, buy insurance or a home or learn to save and plan for retirement would benefit from the Dave Ramsey Financial Peace University.

It's a series of 13 classes in churches and community centers around the country. You meet in a group, watch these hilariously entertaining videos about money - can you believe math and finance is interesting and funny?

My husband and I took the course about 3 years ago and we paid off all our debt (except my student loan) - had a baby without accruing any debt, bought a used mini-van with cash, we just bought our first house, and we keep an emergency fund and learned to save automatically.

We were bankrupt before taking the class. Now I have no doubt that we'll retire with at least a million dollars.

The classes are CHEAP at around $100 per family and they offer free childcare during the class, two books, a set of audio tapes, a bunch of planning documents on CD, and financial help for the rest of your life.

It's hardcore. It's finance like my depression-era grandparents and my parents lived by. Save first, spend what's left, buy what you need not what you want, make hard sacrifices early so you're secure in the future. It's pretty hard actually. But, it's sound. - go to the site and enter your zip code and you'll find out when and where classes are being held in your area.